5 tips to help keep your emotions from controlling you
How to keep your emotions from controlling you
Pause, breathe, and choose how you respond
“Almost all our suffering is the product of our thoughts... You can break this spell, but it takes training — just like it takes training to defend yourself against a physical assault.”
— Sam Harris, author & neuroscientist
As humans, we’re wired to feel the full spectrum of emotion.
Anger, fear, guilt, frustration, joy, delight, peace — these are the experiences that make us who we are.
But while emotions are essential, unregulated emotions — especially those on the more difficult end of the spectrum — can start to impact our relationships, work performance, and mental and physical health.
The good news? You’re not at the mercy of your emotions.
Through mindfulness, you can observe your thoughts and reactions, rather than becoming ruled by them.
🎬 The Movie Analogy: Why We Get Stuck in Reactivity
Sam Harris uses the analogy of a movie theatre to explain how we get lost in thought — and how mindfulness can help pull us back.
Imagine watching a powerful film. You're fully absorbed — you jump, laugh, or cry. You're immersed in the story. But then, for a moment, the spell breaks, and you realise: I'm just sitting in a cinema watching images on a screen.
That same principle applies to your thoughts.
They're not facts. They're not always reality. But when we’re not mindful, we believe and react to them as if they are.
When someone lashes out, we get angry in return. When a colleague is anxious or negative, it rubs off on us. This is what it means to be in reactivity — always responding to what's happening around us without conscious choice.
🧠 Mindfulness Helps Us Break the Cycle
With practice, we learn to pause, observe, and reset before reacting.
We realise: I am not my thoughts.
This awareness gives us the power to shift from emotional reactivity to emotional resilience.
🛠️ 5 Mindfulness-Based Tips to Manage Emotional Reactivity
Try these simple, science-backed techniques next time you feel triggered, overwhelmed, or spiralling into reaction mode.
1. Pause Before You Respond
Take a beat. Even 3–5 seconds is enough to shift your perspective.
Remind yourself: “These are just thoughts — they will pass.”
Let the initial wave settle before making a decision or speaking.
2. Use Your Breath as a Reset Button
Breath is your built-in tool for calming the nervous system.
Try this:
Inhale slowly through the nose for 4 counts
Hold for 2 counts
Exhale gently for 6 counts through the mouth or nose
Repeat for 1–2 minutes and notice the shift.
3. Give It 90 Seconds
Neuroscience shows that emotional triggers can be neutralised in just 90 seconds if we allow the feelings to rise and fall without fuelling them.
Let the emotion wash over you — then move forward with clarity.
4. Shift Into Gratitude
Anger and gratitude can’t coexist.
If you're feeling reactive, pause and ask:
What am I grateful for in this moment?
Who can I silently appreciate right now?
Even small recognitions can dissolve emotional tension.
5. Step Away From the Trigger
Sometimes you need physical space to create emotional space.
Take a walk, leave the room, or simply get fresh air.
Movement helps you return to your body, process the emotion, and regain perspective.
🌿 Final Thought
You don’t need to “stop” emotions.
But you can stop being controlled by them.
With mindful awareness, you learn to notice what’s happening without becoming swept away by it.
You become the observer, not the character in the movie.
This is where freedom lives — and it starts with one breath, one pause, one kind response at a time.
Want to build emotional resilience in your team or workplace?
Corporate Yoga Australia offers classes, talks, and workshops that integrate mindfulness, breathwork, and emotional wellbeing into the workday.
